Day 18 - Merry Christmas...again

Our little girl was sweet today. We had so much fun. Papa was definitely her favorite for most of the visit and we were even able to convince her to hand something over that was "kaka" but she insisted on playing with. Oh yeah, I keep forgetting today is Christmas here. She did seem more in the Christmas spirit today. A spent time with all of the typical things but today she found a clothes hamper full of toys. She, of course, decided to unload half of these and only played with two of them. Most of the toys were these little squeaky toys that kinda look like dog toys. They don't use stuffed animals because of the germs so they are what all of the kids in her classroom are always playing with. Her favorites were a doll (big surprise) and chain of shapes that she could take apart and put back together.

She really enjoys mimicing us and today was no exception. I was making a sound like I was straining trying to take apart the chain pieces, and so she started doing it too. Absolutely adorable. A was clearly ready for lunch today, but she did not get fussy or even get impatient. She politely picked up all of the toys and started blowing kisses and waving. We brought her upstairs and she held out her arms for us to take her sweater off, pulled up her sleeves to wash her hands, and she was done with us. Normally this would be hard to take but today, on Christmas, it was just fantastic to see our little girl so happy. When we last saw her, she was politely sitting in her chair at the table, just watching us walk out while she patiently waited for lunch to be served.

Day 17 - Papa Proves Himself

Today is Christmas Eve here, crazy right?? This has been the longest holiday season ever. We brought A another outfit today and she actually started undressing herself so that we could change her, so cute!

Unfortunately, today she started getting desperately hungry 30 minutes before lunch time. I am so proud of my husband who managed to keep her content or laughing for most of that time. It took a lot of work on his part and every trick in the bag, but it worked! Part of this plan was letting her pick her things up on her own today which stretches it out a bit. She had found some doll clothes on one of the shelves in a plastic bag earlier and we also brought her clothes in a plastic bag (I know great wrapping paper right?). When I held out the plastic bag to put the doll clothes up she thought that I was asking for the clothes that we brought her. She grabbed her shirt and said "Nyet" in a very concerned way. I felt so bad that she thought that we were taking her clothes away.

Even with how hungry A was today, she still cried when she realized we were leaving. I didn't think she would since she was sooo ready to go to her classroom, and when we brought her up she quickly left our side to be with the other kids waiting. Yet, when she turned to see Chris waiving at her and saying "paka" (bye), her face just crumpled up and tears were starting to flow. So sad, but so sweet and reassuring at the same time.

We were only able to bring her back personally because we brought a picture of A today for her classroom. The caretakers asked to have one of her so that they can put it up with the other pictures of kids who have been adopted. It was sweet how proud they are of their children!

Great news, we got our court date today! We will be going to court on January 12th. We will let you all know when we will be returning once we change our plain tickets. I am really hoping that it gets warmer here soon because my husband is about to drive me crazy as he goes more stir crazy! The less we can go outside, the worse he gets. Ugh, he is a goofball but I love him.

Day 16 - The Softer Side of A

To my wife (this is Chris), what an amazing mother you naturally are! You other readers will understand by the end of this post, and it will be a rather short one due to the nature of today's time with A.

It is cold here! I know this is no surprise or new thing, but it is really cold! A is certainly feeling the weather, and she was a bit solemn when she saw us today. Still excited, still came directly to us, but with less enthusiasm than most days. She played with her bday present while just sitting in my lap, we played a little "catch me Papa!", and even laughed a bit in the stroller, but even during these activities she would stop and look like she was feeling crummy.

Enter her mommy. At one point about 20 minutes in, A grabbed ahold of Cindy and sat in her lap with a rather freakish one armed, balding baby doll. Cindy started rocking her, and A fought only a tiny bit before drifting off for the next 45 minutes! Obviously Cindy has that "motherly touch" already in her, and A senses that. The only noise for the rest of our time was that of her favorite little music box (K&D, you are the best!) and A's cute little sucking of her bottom lip.

Papa didn't come back into the picture except when she briefly awoke a few times. I knew this would happen and my worst fear would be realized: my daughter would wake up and the sight of me would cause her to SCREAM! But my darling A surprised me yet again. She opened her eyes, looked deep into mine, and drifted back into her dreams. Even when we woke her so I could carry her back upstairs, A just grabbed on to me and calmly enjoyed her ride to her room.

No fuss when we left, just longing (and still very tired) eyes and a blown kiss with a wave. A perfect ending to a fantastic day with a daughter that trusts us enough to rock her to sleep.

Day 16- Birthday Girl

Today was our precious little girl's 2nd birthday and venturing out in the cold yesterday was completely worth it. She was more excited today to see us than she has ever been, and they dressed her in an outfit that we dropped off yesterday. All of the children sat down in their chairs at the little bitty tables and patiently waited for their chocolate. All of the kids were so cute, the chocolate started melting, of course, so they had it all over their hands and faces by the time they were all done.

We then took A to the bonding room and gave her birthday present. She again loved the stringy stuff that we put in the bag and thoroughly enjoyed her Russian speaking toy. At one point while she was playing something started banging in another room. She looked around and, in Russian, said "Who is That?" and started making a hammering motion with her hands. She is saying so much more now than when we first met her two weeks ago. A was a bit of a daddy's girl today, and she was so affectionate and ticklish. She just didn't stop laughing and smiling for about the first 45 minutes.

For the last half of our visit A showed us that she believes in the song lyrics, "It's my birthday and I can cry if I want to". I cannot complain about this because I remember many birthday parties that I ran to my room (on a sugar high) crying. Today it was because we had to take things away from her. I know that we have to do this at some point, but it sure would be nice to have been able to wait until we got home. She was not okay with it, but again she allowed us to hold her and calm her as she screamed. She did calm down before we brought her back to her room but yet again she started crying when we had to leave her.

The neatest thing that we got to do for her birthday was petition for court. We finished a bunch of paperwork with her new name, requesting the change of birth certificate and passport. Normally this stuff has been annoying but we were just beeming with joy. The best thing that we could do for A's birthday is request for the courts to allow us to adopt her (of course it would be better to be able to bring her home, but we do what we can). We will know on the 6th when our court date will be. It still makes me sick to think of leaving her but the quicker all of this goes through, the sooner she will be home.

Day 15 - She likes us...she really likes us!

This is Chris writing again, Cindy has been traumitized a bit so she is sitting this one out. I scared her a bit on the walk home from the store a few minutes ago, and I hope I never put her in the same type of situation. As you know, it is a bit icy and slick here. Well, I joined the ranks of those who have fallen before me while in an alley. The fall was not what scared her though, instead that just resulted in me forcing out a few explatives that I wish I could take back. The scary part is that I apparently should have stayed down for a second, because a few steps later I passed out! From Cindy's story, I softly crumbled to the ground with my eyes rolled back, and I stayed there long enough for Cindy to scream for help 4 or 5 times. This sounds incredibly dramatic (and for Cindy I bet it was/is), but I came to and felt perfect. Save the incredible pain in my lower back where all of my weight hit the ice in one specific spot.

But, it is a happy day, and you all are probably more concerned with how A is doing. Well, we left her in some major tears, but it is because even lunch is not a substitution for her mom and dad. As her typical actions, we could tell she was hungry when she told us bye, waived, put on her hat, and started putting toys away. This is really cute of course, but also sad that she is ready to leave. Especially when, like today, we still had another 25 minutes with her. She was quickly distracted, and the rest of play time ensued. When it was time to go up stairs, she started putting up her toys, but she seemed to stall a bit by putting toys up that were already in their rightful place. When we finally carried her up stairs to her room, one of the caretakers reached for her and the tears started flowing. She turned, reached out to her mommy and daddy and wailed. I am sure people walking by on the street heard our hearts break and fall to the floor. Selfishly, I loved it at the same time!

Earlier in play time, A was acting a bit more attached to us. First, I must tell you about how dad got one on the scoreboard. Being a holiday, Cindy and I went to A's classroom to pick her up. She saw us, had to put on her shoes before moving, but then ran straight over to us where Cindy was very obviously blocking the gate with her outstretched arms. As soon as A got to her, she squeezed by and ran to her papa. What a great feeling! (sorry Cindy)

Her attachment continued through most of playtime as she seldom wanted to be on the ground. Instead, she kept wanting to be held and hugged. This is very different from her normal personality, but every day seems to keep us on our toes.

She did find a new toy/game to play today. Due to the dry weather here, our poor daughter's bottom lip is split open. Today, she did something that reopened the wound and started bleeding. To help her heal, we got out the Blistex and rubbed some on her lips. She loved it, and all she wanted to do for the next little while was put it on her lips, put in on Cindy's lips, and then put it on my lips. Over and over again. I am still not sure how we got it out of her hands.

We almost did not get to go this morning, because there was a severe weather warning that asked everyone to stay inside today. This is pretty big since this city walks everywhere. Still, we ventured in taxis to the baby house, and walked in the bitter cold to the store. Why is the store important enough to risk freezing (and falling)? Because A's parents already love her so much that they just had to go buy enough juice, fruit, and treats for her whole class to enjoy tomorrow on A's 2nd birthday! We are so excited and feel so blessed to be able to celebrate with her.

Day 14 -

So I mentioned yesterday that it was cold, today we were late for the orphanage because the van froze. I am not sure how this works?? Growing up in Louisiana we don't have to worry about things like this. We had to get a cab so we were about 30 minutes late. It was still a great visit. We were allowed to go get her from her room again today and all of the babies were trying to play with Chris. They were all trying to hand their toys to Chris. He would take them then hand them back. The poor babies just want some love. I wish we could take them all home with us.

I am not sure what our A was doing but she was sitting under some furniture in the corner and the other kids were around her so we couldn't see. Of course once she saw us she came to us with a smile. Her favorite words today were Mama and Papa. She even used them several times when it was clear she was calling for us. This puts such a warm feeling in my heart. She is getting more and more comfortable with us which is great although it allowing for us to see all emotions, fun and difficult. She is not afraid of letting us know what she wants. We are just thankful that she lets us calm her when she gets upset. So many parents in this situation have children who are sensitive to touch and it makes this impossible. Our interpreter informed that A is also saying Russian words that means "Give Me" and "Take this". We will have work on please more when she gets home!

Again today she was not ready to leave and neither were we. We brought her back to her room and when we put her down she backed up to my legs and held on to them so I bent down and gave her a long hug and our translator told her that we would be back tomorrow and that it was time to go. After several minutes she stepped away. I am almost in tears (correct that, in tears) writing about this now. It breaks my heart so much to leave her every day and the idea of getting closer to having to leave her for over a month kills me. I know that this is just one more step to bringing her home, but it is still difficult.

On a lighter note we were able to explore some great Kazakh culuture today with the help of our translators. We went to a museum that was very educational and interesting, but also very cold in half of it. We also walked through this amazing park. When we were done we decided to take the bus back since it was crazy cold, but while we were waiting we decided it might be better to call a taxi. Our translator's phone died so Chris offered his. When she was handing back to him, it slipped (cold hands and all) and because the phone was probably frozen, the screen cracked. I felt so sorry for our translator and we tried to convince her that it was time to change to Verizon anyway. Either way Chris is now without a phone until we get back. Oh and we did use the bus which was about 33 cents per person. It was not as scary as I feared and also not as warm as I hoped. We were assured that it will warm back up in a couple of days. Maybe it will get up to negative 20!

Day 13 - Beginning of the English Language

New Years around here is such a huge deal that the party in our hotel was still going at 6:00am this morning. Then when we tried to go down for breakfast they told us it would not be open until 10:00am. I am pretty sure that people are not expected to function on New Years Day. I thought this was just a crazy party, but our translator said she was out until 5:00am and this was normal. And we thought we did good staying up past midnight! Because of this I was a little concerned about how A would be today. I had this fear that the caretakers would come dragging in after partying all night and it would put our little girl in a bad mood. Thankfully this was not the case. We were able to go get her from her room again and the care takers were bright eyed and bushy tailed (not really sure what that means but you get the point, they were awake).

A was very happy to see us. She did not have her shoes on so she stayed where she was until someone could come and put them on for her. The caretakers had dressed her in the outfit that we bought her. So this is the second day in a row that she is wearing it. We like to think that she picked it out and insisted on wearing it (I know she is two and this is not likely, but it is a nice thought so I am going to choose to believe that this is how it happened).

I am also happy to say that there were no accidents today. She was in a much better mood today. We were reading a book together and she was saying "Moo" with the cow and would point at the googley eyes in a book and say "eye". She also says "Bye" now instead of the Russian, "PaKa". I feel that she will catch on quickly. Another big step today, she let us hold the water bottle for her when she was drinking. I know this seems quite backwards but it is very good for her to start depending on us. A is a very independent little girl and each time she allows us to do something for her it is a step in the right direction. She is also able to take the screw top lid off by herself, a little scary! She has not quite gotten the whole putting it back on thing down yet.

We had one more freak out today when our translator left the room. This was likely due to her thinking that she left and was not going to come back to get her for lunch. It broke my heart. I recognize that she is going to attach some to the translator because she is there every day with us, but it was still hard for me to see her get so upset when she left. Thankfully she still let us comfort her and again her little music box did the trick (Thank you again Kat and Derek). We then went and sat down and gave her some water. It was as if nothing happened. I am very happy to see that when she freaks out she does not push us away of even get agressive. She allows us to hold and comfort her until all is better.

A is not doing quite as well with putting her toys up. In some ways this is nice because she is not in such a hurry to leave us, but I really don't want to break this habit. Today we were able to bring her back to her room and she held on to her Papa and was singing all the way upstairs. We put her down in her room and she walked around a corner, then came right back and made a face like, "Are you coming?". It was great to have those beautiful wide eyes looking at us when we left. No tears and no screams, just joy.

One last side note. IT IS COLD! How cold is it?

Well, a river with sheets of ice floating in it was giving off a substantial amount of steam.

Fun Fact: Did you know that celsius and fahrenheit equal each other at negative 40 degrees? We didn't need to know that before coming here!

This picture says it all...